The Need for Self-Talk – Part 2

What to Say When You Talk to Yourself

When I considered what was the best approach to using affirmations, I almost immediately thought of the method described in the bestselling book by Shad Helmstetter – What to Say When You Talk to Yourself. As far as I could recall, I did not remember this author giving way-out, unbelievable testimonies; I did not recall him ever using New Age speak, such as “aligning your vibration with the universe”.

I was curious, so I took another look at the book. It had been about 15 years since I had first read this book and since I had last used secular, self-help affirmations. When I glanced through the book, I was struck by how down-to-earth and practical it all sounded. The author was not trying to urge people to do something unattainable.

Self-Talk for Your Attitude in the Present Moment

Self-Talk seems to work mainly at changing a person’s attitude towards something – something that they typically face in their everyday life in this present moment. Attitude is extremely important because it determines a person’s desires, and desires strongly influence a person’s actions.

There is nothing “magic” about changing your attitude – there is no need to use New Age mumbo-jumbo to approach the subject of making real, lasting changes to yourself and your life. The simple, down-to-earth, practical way that Shad Helmstetter tackles the subject of using affirmations to change your life – has now become very appealing to me.

The affirmations in Shad’s book sounded like pep-talk statements, such as, “I believe in myself, I have what it takes to do the job at hand and to do it well.” I feel that pep-talk statements can be believed by almost anybody. Whatever it is that you do at this moment, you can tell yourself that you are good and capable at doing it. That means that if you are a schoolteacher, accountant, housewife, salesperson, plumber or mechanic – whatever it is that you do – you can believe that you can be good at whatever it is you do.

This does not mean that you should give up your dreams and surrender to a lifetime on a career path that you no longer wish to pursue. But it is important to be able to discern the difference between a realistic, definite aspiration and a whim. I think the more negative minded a person is – the more likely they are to experience, and be swept away by, whims.

Wherever you want to go in life, I believe that the answer is to stick to your current path until a side road presents itself. Until a valid opportunity comes your way, you really have no choice but continue with what you are doing at this moment. Self-Talk can help by dealing with your attitude to what it is that you face right now in this moment. Over you can have a good attitude towards the people and things in your life – or you can have a bad attitude – the choice is yours. Self-Talk can help you make a shift from a bad attitude to a good attitude.

We typically struggle with affirmations that get us focused on something we are not, or do not already have or do. A person who stacks shelves in a supermarket could tell himself all day that he is a doctor – but it won’t make much difference to that person’s life. What will make a difference is investigating what is required to study for becoming a doctor, the cost of it, how the study can be accommodated in your current lifestyle, and so on. Affirmations can help with that, but there is a need to be practical and realistic.

I reached a point whereby I was fed-up with the tall-stories I read in self-help books and heard in mega churches; I got bored and disillusioned with the pep-talks that they would give – it never seemed to make a lasting difference to my life. But as Dr. Helmstetter points out in his book – Self-Talk is more than just a pep-talk because it programs your mind with new, positive beliefs. If that is true – this could be something worth pursuing.