Why Affirmations Don’t Work – Part 1

Affirmations don’t work because they do not get to the underlying causes of a person’s neurosis.

Advocates of The Sedona Method and The Work seem to both acknowledge that it is not a good idea to layer positive thoughts on top of negative ones. It is better to actually pay attention to the anxious thoughts with a view to letting them go through The Sedona Method or questioning them through The Work. In fact, it is this discovery that often leads a person to either one of these two self-help methods; it is almost as if affirmations serve as an introduction to The Sedona Method or The Work.

Escapism and Unrealistic Expectations

Now that I look back on affirmations with hindsight I can see that I tried to use them as a form of escapism: I tried to create a perfect future by controlling my thoughts about it in the present. This seems to be a common trend amongst self-help gurus, who encourage their followers to envisage a perfect self in a perfect future, were there will be no more problems, only happiness and nice things. I think this is one of the ways in which you can know that you are off course in your use of affirmations. Any system that emphasises the destination more than the journey will definitely get you off-track.

I think visualisation is even worse because it encourages neurotics to fantasise about things in their mind. I am flabbergasted that these self-help and spiritual gurus who are trusted by thousands of people all over the world, make absolutely no allowance whatsoever for the neurotic mindset. Surely, they must be aware that there will be people with serious mental and emotional issues who are more than likely to go off on a tangent with their teaching?

The thing that makes such teaching so misleading is the way that they always seem to use totally extreme, out of the ordinary anecdotes to get their message across. People are told that they can perform miracles, they can do the impossible and they can be rich beyond their wildest dreams. What people don’t realise is that the likelihood is that they aren’t ever going to live the millionaire playboy lifestyle they fantasise about – they are much more likely to live in an average house, with an average looking partner, doing an average nine-to-five job.

It seems to me that the more insecure a person is the more frustrated, disappointed and anxious they will be. “Everyday life” is like a swear-word to these people – it seems to be too disappointing or difficult for them to cope with. Therefore, they are prone to creating some sort of elaborate fantasy to escape from it all. I don’t mind the concept of making the most of life and being good and effective at what you do, or even being successful and prosperous. But I take issue with the way in which self-help and spiritual gurus actively encourage fantasy amongst vulnerable neurotics who need professional help: they need balance and the right kind of encouragement more than they need to be told they can become outrageously wealthy – if they follow a certain set of steps.

I’m not speaking from mere speculation here – I have been in that position as an anxiety sufferer myself, so I know what it is like. It took me many years of frustration, disappointment and empty promises to finally come out of that mental and emotional condition and finally get my feet on solid ground. You see, that is the inevitable conclusion in the pursuit of unrealistic expectations: eventually, after years of putting lots of time and effort into this kind of stuff, you will end-up feeling defeated, depressed and deceived.